ATTACHMENT THEORY

“The quality of early attachments lays the groundwork for emotional regulation, social competence, and mental well-being throughout life." - John Bowlby

Let's Get Secure

WHAT IS ATTACHMENT

THEORY?

If you don’t live under a rock, then you have probably heard of the 5 love languages. The “how” you need to be loved (physical touch, quality time, acts of service, words of affirmation, or gifts).

Most couples and individuals end up stopping there, thinking they have solved the issue without asking the golden question…. “But why do I need to be loved that way?”.

Think of a cupcake, and the frosting of the cupcake is your love language. Now move to the cake part, your attachment style. Your why is your love language. Your attachment style explains and describes why you need to be loved that way.

A young couple stands closely together near a body of water during sunset, with the sun positioned between them creating a bright backlit scene, and hanging branches in the foreground.

HOW WAS ATTACHMENT THEORY FORMED?

The British psychologist John Bowlby was the first attachment theorist. He described attachment as a "lasting psychological connectedness between human beings." Attachment is an emotional bond with another person. Bowlby believed that the earliest bonds formed by children with their caregivers have a tremendous impact that continues throughout life.

The central theme of attachment theory is that primary caregivers who are available and responsive to an infant's needs allow the child to develop a sense of security. The infant learns that the caregiver is dependable, which creates a secure base for the child to then explore the world. If you have ever heard of the need to “heal that inner child,” this is what they mean.

BOOM. Connection made. Sound Interesting? Let’s find out your style click on the quiz button to find out yours today!

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A couple standing in front of a house, smiling and looking at each other.

What are the four attachment styles?

  • Secure attachment is like having a solid emotional backbone. Individuals with secure attachment styles feel confident both in themselves and in their relationships. They're comfortable expressing their needs and emotions, knowing they can rely on their partners for support when needed. Securely attached individuals have healthy communication skills and enjoy fulfilling, long-lasting relationships built on trust and mutual respect.

  • Anxious-preoccupied attachment can feel like constantly second-guessing your worth in relationships. Individuals with this attachment style may worry about being abandoned or not being good enough for their partners. They may seek constant reassurance and validation, fearing rejection. Therapy can help individuals with anxious-preoccupied attachment learn to manage their insecurities, build self-confidence, and develop healthier ways of relating to others.

  • Dismissive-avoidant attachment is like keeping others at arm's length while craving independence. Individuals with this attachment style may downplay the importance of close relationships and prefer solitude. They may struggle with intimacy and expressing their emotions, often feeling uncomfortable with emotional vulnerability. Therapy can help individuals with dismissive-avoidant attachment explore their feelings, overcome intimacy barriers, and develop deeper connections with others.

  • Fearful-avoidant attachment combines the fear of rejection with the desire for closeness. Individuals with this attachment style may oscillate between wanting intimacy and fearing vulnerability. They may feel torn between seeking connection and protecting themselves from potential hurt. Therapy can help individuals with fearful-avoidant attachment understand their conflicting emotions, heal past wounds, and cultivate healthier relationship dynamics.

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Ready to Shift to Secure?
Download You Attachment Style Workbook

Large Bundle Attachment Workbook

This 80-page Large Bundle Attachment Style Combination Workbook is going to walk you through in-depth each style and characteristic. This workbook includes therapeutic conversation starters, journal prompts, and lessons centered around the 4 types of attachment styles.

This is a PDF download straight to your computer in your hands in less than 2 minutes.

DOWNLOAD HERE
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Mini Workbook
Package

This 33-page mini Attachment Style Combination Workbook is going to walk you through briefly each style and charactersitics. This workbook includes therapeutic conversation starters, journal prompts, and lessons centered around the 4 types of attachment styles.

This is a PDF download straight to your computer in your hands in less than 2 minutes.

DOWNLOAD HERE
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Anxious Attachment

This 33-page workbook is going to walk you through your Anxious Attachment style, characteristics, as well as healing techniques, and exercises. This is a great tool to take a deeper dive into your Anxious Syle and how to start the healing.

This is a PDF download straight to your computer in your hands in less than 2 minutes.

DOWNLOAD HERE
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Dismissive Avoidant Attachment

This 35-page workbook is going to walk you through your Dismissive Avoidant Attachment style, characteristics, as well as healing techniques, and exercises. This is a great tool to take a deeper dive into your Dismissive Attachment Syle and to start the healing.

This is a PDF download straight to your computer in your hands in less than 2 minutes.

DOWNLOAD HERE
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Fearful Avoidant Attachment

This 34-page workbook is going to walk you through your Fearful Avoidant Attachment style, characteristics, as well as healing techniques, and exercises. This is a great tool to take a deeper dive into your Fearful Attachment Syle and to start the healing.

This is a PDF download straight to your computer in your hands in less than 2 minutes.

DOWNLOAD HERE
Cover of a workbook titled 'Fearful Avoidant Attachment Workbook' with a silhouette of a person and the Northern Lights in the background.